It is so easy to not look at yourself and judge! We live in a society who teaches that everyone is the blame. Your parents, your up bringing, status, education or lack of education. If you want to blame others we can all do it!
The truth about me is that I am indifferent at times with those around me. I have gotten so upset that I removed some of these people from my life entirely. Some were not worthy due to conduct that did not match what I believed. They are passing ships. I hold not ill will toward these folks. However some was good for me and some not so good for me. I call it “WALL BUILDING!”
At times I think these walls gave me comfort. At times I think these walls cost me time with people who should have been in my life. The truth about me is that I am emotional and human! When I feel hurt I am going to go into reaction mode and protect me. This is a natural survival tool.
Today I try harder not to do this. When you build walls you loose relationships and memories with those you have exiled. The truth I am the one who was in the walls I built. Right in the center of those walls!
Today I am stronger because of the knowledge of this behavior. I work at fostering time together. I try to take my daughters for a lunch or share a special meal around our table with our family. A lot of great meals and fellowship have happened around this space.
I reach out by picking up the phone, I volunteer and I remind my self to stay connected to those you treasure.
I am so thankful that no matter what I am going through in my life I have learned to be open to what I need to do to keep the door of my heart open. God will heal things that happen to me. Because the truth about me is Jesus has my life. I just need to let him be the great work in me!